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	<title>Michael E. Gruen &#187; considerate</title>
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		<title>Integrity now!</title>
		<link>http://blog.michaelgruen.com/2008/05/integrity-now/</link>
		<comments>http://blog.michaelgruen.com/2008/05/integrity-now/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 06:09:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>mg</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[chronicles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[declarations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rants]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[commitment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[considerate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[greeting cards]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[integrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rules]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.michaelgruen.com/?p=51</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There are too many &#8220;Sorry I missed your birthday&#8221; cards. This bodes poorly for society.  Since when did breaking commitments become acceptable social practice? The market for witty proxy apologies is booming.* Diligent and timely communication, thanks in part to cellphones and text messages, gives way to half-assed correspondence and lackadaisical relationship management.  Enough, already! For the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>There are too many &#8220;Sorry I missed your birthday&#8221; cards. This bodes poorly for society. </p>
<p>Since when did breaking commitments become acceptable social practice? The market for witty proxy apologies is booming.* Diligent and timely communication, thanks in part to cellphones and text messages, gives way to half-assed correspondence and lackadaisical relationship management. </p>
<p>Enough, already!</p>
<p>For the sake of brevity, let&#8217;s get to it:</p>
<p><strong>Gruen&#8217;s Rules of Integrity. </strong></p>
<ol>
<li>Rule: If you say you&#8217;re going to do something, do it&#8230; even if at great cost to you.<br />
 </li>
<li>Rule: If you must break Rule 1 for whatever reason, notify any relevant parties <em>immediately</em>.<br />
The broken commitment may be due to unforeseen circumstances or prohibitive cost&#8211; the reason is less important than the effort. People can sense insincerity.<br />
 </li>
<li>Rule: Make up broken commitments as soon as possible.<br />
Be extra sure not to break that one.<br />
 </li>
<li>Rule: Number 2 is the exception, not the rule.<br />
If you find yourself breaking commitments often, stop making commitments that you will likely break. Learn why you do this, and fix it.<br />
 </li>
<li>Rule: Being &#8220;flighty&#8221; is not an excuse.<br />
However, pragmatically, it is OK to break commitments with flighty people after they have personally demonstrated their flightiness to you. With these individuals, it&#8217;s OK to make other commitments provided you inform the third party of the situation. <br />
 </li>
<li>Rule: Don&#8217;t overcommit. Say No.<br />
Committing to everyone means committing to no one. It&#8217;s OK to say &#8216;no&#8217;, or &#8216;no for now&#8217;. <br />
  </li>
<li>Rule: Be Honest.<br />
Don&#8217;t lie. Though, there&#8217;s no obligation to speak the entire truth or offer information. </li>
</ol>
<p>Succinctly: <strong>Be Considerate.</strong></p>
<p>More on this later. (And you can count on that.)</p>
<p> </p>
<p>&#8211;</p>
<p>*Don&#8217;t believe me? Visit your local card store or pharmacy and take notice of &#8220;regret&#8221; cards.</p>
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